I've made my choice.

As I write this post , it will be the last of what you'll hear from me .. and no .. I'm not dying (:

I thank you though, fellow readers out there who has been following my blog (: My apologise for not putting in the effort to make it more meaningful and interesting ( hmm .. I wonder since when it was ever interesting in the first place .. haha ) Oh well, it's just that I feel pointless in trying to continue this blog because it has lost it's meaning .. plus just trying to update for the sake of updating ain't helping at all.

Life as it is, that's was what my blog is all about but I think despite what happens in my life, I don't have to go on jotting down every single thing of my thoughts here. I'll do just alright keeping it to myself (:

So off the blogging world for me, this is the end of the chapter of

A boy on a string ..

-190609-

A boy on his knees .. exhausted & ashamed

this chapter of my life is called : superman-in-the-making

I'll always remember Isaiah 40 : 30
" that even when you grow tired and weary, and when young men stumble and fall, but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength, they will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk .. and not be faint "

Running this race, this whole Christian life .. is getting really really really tough .. it's hard .. and i can't take it sometimes, the feeling of not bothering about my stands anymore, the feeling of hopelessness, I'm tired .. question is ' What is God doing? and why? '

Such a normal phrase that almost everyone would have said it before, but this really sucks a lot, and it scares me sometimes. What happened to the fire that I had burning within me? That passion for Christ, living for His name. Hack! Sometimes .. I feel ashamed being known as a believer now, as Your son.

I'm sorry .. I'm sorry for the things that I've done that wasn't pleasing into your eyes, for the things I've said about You. doubting and cursing.

I know that You are GOD and I should be trusting and putting my faith in You. and no matter how hard it is right now .. in believing .. in a whole lot of things .. please be with me Lord?

I find it hard to stand before you sometimes, to be worship leading or to play for You, I can't do it with a heavy heart. i don't want to be a hypocrite.

The pressure in this world, to not give in .. takes a lot of guts and strength .. it's just sometimes, I just want a sense of belonging and not being the odd one, you know? but I guess, I should know myself.

One thing is for sure, I've never forgotten about my promise to You, that as long as I am in this world .. I'll continue to testify in Your name, spreading the good news and to carry my cross daily for You ..

- it's time to get right with the You

Lord, please forgive me .. =/

H o p e

despite the fallen rain .. as least the sun still tries to shine ..

with a grateful heart..

I love you Yasmin Ahmad for the work you have done

that had touched all of us with this beautiful story..

A must watch movie .. (9/10)

Welcome to life =D

Hello, good morning, everyone underneath the glorious Son
I wrote a little song for you
Sometimes we forget we are the image of the Love of God
So please, if you don't mind, let me remind you
That we were made to love each other as a sister and a brother,
imitate perfection in this imperfect world

So, welcome to life; I hope you enjoy it
in between yesterday and tomorrow.
Welcome to life; I hope that you get it right

And on the way, I do confess we stumble, fall,
and make a mess of everything we try to hold dear.
So be honest when you pray, and maybe thank Him for today.

Let go of the future so unclear
Listen for the voice of mercy, cast out all your fear and worry
Can't you see you've only got room for the cross?

So, welcome to life; I hope you enjoy it
in between yesterday and tomorrow.
Welcome to life; I hope that you get it right

And you live and you'll die; you'll be honest and you'll lie.
Put you trust where the truth is and your treasure where you heart is.

So, welcome to life; I hope you enjoy it
in between yesterday and tomorrow.
Welcome to life; I hope that you get it--

And, welcome to life; I hope you enjoy it
in between yesterday and tomorrow.
Welcome to life; I hope that we get it right,

I hope that we get it right...

matt maher - welcome to life

=(

I look beyond the empty cross

forgetting what my life has cost

and wipe away the crimson stains

"dull the nails that still remain"

More and more I need you now,I owe you more each passing hour

the battle between grace and pride I gave up not so long ago

So steal my heart and take the pain

and wash the feet and cleanse my pride

take the selfish, take the weak,

and all the things I cannot hide

take the beauty, take my tears

the sin-soaked heart and make it yours

take my world all apart

take it now, take it now

and serve the ones that I despise

speak the words I can't deny

watch the world I used to love

fall to dust and thrown away

-jars of clay -worlds apart

- wipe away the crimson stain..

Back to square one

"As the heavens are higher than the earth,

so are My ways higher than your ways

and My thoughts than your thoughts"

- Isaiah 55:9 -

so why not just leave just about everything to Him?
It does feel good if you just let Him be...and you mind your own business

AirAsia: The Story So Far

Directed by (my all time fav) acclaimed film & commercial director Yasmin Ahmad. The story of how Kamarudin Meranun (AirAsia director) and Tony Fernandes (AirAsia CEO, Founder) made the first budget no-frills airline, AirAsia, to Malaysians with the tagline "Now everyone can fly". Just watching the video clip below, inspiring.. Dreams do come true? Feel inspired? I do feel anything is possible if you go for it =) Don't let anything stop you.

the night that end it's chapter

Date 16 Jan 09
Time 8 31 pm

so i'm standing in the middle of the train looking around me, no place to sit. I turn to my left and notice a women in her 20's sniffing softly trying to wipe her tears away after reading a msg in her phone over and over again, standing at the corner of the door in the train just staring at the dark view outside the window. If only I had a tissue with me..

I turn to my right .. and I could hear laugthers and the smiles on their faces of young teenage guys and girls..

Both emotions. thats how i felt that very night. Oh and in case you didnt know? It's the end of my internship =)

so how did it go?

Awesome I would say.. For the experience that i've gone through, the people that I have met! In her last recording voice-over, Joanna Bessey actually recorded a song and gave it to me for my last day of work. It was so sweet of her to do so, not forgetting she has a beautiful voice. I had a good time working together with my colleagues and my boss. I know I never reveal in pictures about my company or about my work. Reason being it's because i wanna keep it P&C .. College encouraged us not to write about our company .. so yeah.

oh well, so there is a mix feelings now.. I kinda like work and will miss it despite knowing it's gonna be pressurizing and stressful but heh? which job doesn't? then again, colin gan? Go back to college and finish your course! eheh..I thank God for the creativity He has given me (it always comes just in a nick of time) and never failed.. to meet those crazy datelines.

so here's a toast to manhood. I've tasted it and hey? You know what? It ain't that bad =)

-another chapter end

devotion

You are my strength when I am weak
You are the treasure that I seek
You are my all in all

Seeking You as a precious jewel
Lord to give up, I'll be a fool

Cause You are my all in all

Amen

a time to change

I've seen enough, I heard enough

It's never too late for a change?

Yeap! never to late..

Let's hope there are some progress to it !
Run, fight.. whatever illustration there is..
I believe it's possible to happen

Ain't looking for perfection

ilookatmyselfinamirrorandseeanimageidontwannabesoimgonnatakethismomentochangeineveryaspectwithGod'shelp.

- I got to start taking my own pictures. Haha

Another brand new year..

So it's 2009 already.. not a good start .. Anyway I really wonder what do You have in store for me .. I don't have any clue.. all I know I'm Yours..

I start the day, the war begins, endless reminding of my sin
Time and time again Your truth is drowned out by the storm I'm in
Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away from You leaving me this way

I know You've washed me white, turned my darkness into light
I need Your peace to get me through, to get me through this night
I can't live by what I feel, but by the truth Your word reveals
I'm not holding on to You, but You're holding on to me
You're holding on to me

Jesus, You know just how far the east is from the west
I don't have to see the man I've been come rising up in me again
In the arms of Your mercy I find rest'cause You know just how far the east is from the west
From one scarred hand to the other
One scarred hand to the other
From one scarred hand to the other

east to west - casting crowns

On a random note

Yeap.. it's Chong Keat birthday today.

Happy Birthday beloved brother!!! =D

* pict was taken last year i think *

My beloved is turning 25 =)

l o v e

for love is the Greatest gift of all

A boy in a real world

this chapter of my life is called : Internship

Yeap =) I've decide to blog on what I'm doing in order not to repeat myself over and over again about what I'm really doing currently, so here's to you peeps, I'll be sharing/answering all the common and most question that people would ask me.

I'm currently working at Bangsar in a company called V2 Innovates, it's an advertising company focusing on creative & interactive productions.

What's my role in this company? Well, I'm working directly under my boss, Valens [ Mr.C.E.O/ Director of V2 innovates ] Me on the other hand, am a Media Executive/Project Coordinator
for this company ( yes, name je glamour, but the work is....hell... seriously..haha)

My work contains as a project coordinator, well you all got watch 'The Apprentice' not? it's like that lar. Only thing in this company, when we do bomb each other also, no heart feelings taken. We all can take rejections! (not just for now i hope.. haha) oh and my boss won't say ' You're fired!' haha..die if so? As for a Media Executive? A whole lots of range, I also don't really know how to explain, basically advertising work lah! Haha. Lots of brainstorming and.. stuff =) can be tough? but it's interesting.

So as for my transport? Yes, I take the train everyday....KTM to Sentral and LTR to 'Pak Lah is being punished road' [ Abdullah Hukum ] So far while I'm in the train on my way home, I've been Fart at in such a position that everyone is all squeezed up together in the train plus I've been elbow-by-the-nose by some Pakitani *doot* fella. Don't you just love taking the train home? Everybody is just pushing each other and they certainly love to squeeze among themselve. They love the warm fellowship among one another. I just LOVE malaysian SO much ............. talk about love is patient, love is kind. Sometimes i just feel like strangling some of this ' idiotic-retards '

Oh well, All is well =) I do like it here even though, yes it's far, yes lots and lots of work to do, yes I'm not getting paid at all ( YES! no pay! ) but it's all good, for the experience. I have a good boss and the peeps around me are friendly, that's important.

Plus, After a crazy day at work and the stupid train, I get to go back home and rest or be in the arms of my beloved dear. That's good enough for me =)

- i will learn to enjoy my college life to the fullest,

not gonna complain so much d..

To my one and only

" You'll always be a part of me

I'm a part of you indefinitely

Girl don't you know you can't escape me

Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby "

- Time can't erase a feeling this strong

My testimony..

First of all, I'm surprise that I was in Jun Yi's mind when he was listing the people to do a testimony, ( aww ) I usually don't do tags cause just .. lazy.. but felt that this is different. Jun Yi made a very good point in saying that..

"Your testimony is one where your friends can't argue with, because it happened. It happened, to you. So, share it. Share it with those who need it. Because there are people who need it"

So here is mine, short .. yet amazing.. and that's how He has been in my life...

He has found me! God has promised to be my guide and to lead me to paths everlasting. Psalm 139:23-24 " Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive ways in me, and lead me in the way everlasting "

Lost and clueless I may be, Having Faith and Hope is what keeps us forward knowing that God is with us and for us. I do struggle a lot .. in every aspect, but heh, I'm only human and that's why I have Him.

My future and my hope, I surrender all I owned ,
Jesus come into my life, and take control,
Give my heart and my soul,Everything I have I let go
Jesus come into my life, and make me whole!

What if - Samuel Oh ( Bus Company )

* photo's credited to teo eu-gene

Mummy I lost my head again..

It's stuck =(
help?

- Got to get my head straight

* the bear is just so cute*

One step at a time

A small dude who was once known as 'boy', grows up as a teenager and now, turning into a young adult, never been loved in such a way, has a feel of what manhood is like and wonders how fatherhood is going to be?

Life isn't a bed of roses, That's for sure. It's the reason why we have God as our guide.

" come on now, one step at a time,
slowly..
that's the way"
He says,
"there is not a need to rush"

Responsibilities becomes more heavy each time you are growing older, and unfortunately that's a fact of life.

It's JOB time soon for me.

Am I game for it? oh yeah.. this is just another step I got to take.

In advertising, people thank you for choosing not to be normal

"What's that suppose to mean??!"

" to say I'm special then.. aww.. ok laH, thank you! "

"Lifeless as it may be, having the need to be creative all the time is a challenge,
definably game for it"

- i'm a big boy now =)

Kelam-kabut'ness'

Each time when I look at my watch

or the clock when I'm doing my work,

this is how I see it.

HAHA!

Time just ain't at my side but I'm still chasing after it =)

I know I'll be able to finish my work!

Can't remember when I've been this hardworking?

Heh. Yeah right harkworking -_-

###

Anyway,

To those idiotic ego guys,

it is so darn hard to say the word

'SORRY?'

If you have done something wrong.

What?

In Denial it is? Don't want to admit it?

Why? Shy? Cause will lose your face?

Your face damn big it is?

Can die it is just to appologize?

Stop with the idiotical act.

Immature.. damn immature.

You are no longer a child anymore!

- If you 'felt' whatever I've just said,

then yes I'm speaking to you.

Grow up for goodness sake.

I'm Serious

How 'bout a round of applause?

Yeap, that's right.. *Standing ovation*

- Liverpool beat Man U and Marseille. Thanks for the own goal once again. R.babel is the man.

- Felt the footstool players did a very good performance. Each and everyone cast member, well done footstool players, will continue to pray for you guys as you touched the hearts of those who is yet to know Him =) * I encourage you guys to see it. You'll definately learn a lot, it opens your eyes *

- I'm still able to stand on my two feet.wow. Brain exceeded more than it should have. I'm surprise cause it's been for a long time now.. seriously. More than I should be using.

*Seeking for an inspiration, gosh I don't know how everybody gets their inspiration. My Panadol is finising again, got to let go of those pills. I'm taking it as though it's like a mint. I know it's bad.

-Then again, i'll be able to get through this. *note self* No complains..

- in a difficult moment,

I believe that there is something good

that you can still dwell upon,

just got to embrace it..

remember now colin,

smile =)

You're not alone.